hais~ another emo day for me again. i wonder how many emo days am i going to have?! how long is dis nightmare gonna haunt me on?! i'm realli veri tired le!!! i'm mentally exhuasted!!! can someone please lead me out of dis misery!!! i have to put on a fake smile to work and i'm tired le!!! i zhen de dun noe how long can i hang on to. sometimes i realli wana give up but there are still a lot of things i can't let go. my family, my friends. i noe they will always be there for me but den i realli dun wana them to make them worry. someone told me something. he can happily get back to his previous girlfriend jus 3 days after both of you break soo why must you be de one be tearing and suffering deep inside all by urself?! you are suffering all these alone while he's happily enjoying his time wif his new girlfriend. he must have found back his feelings for her when he was still wif you and dis means he's being unfaithful to you in de first place soo why must you be sad?! he had betrayed dis relationship in de first place. he must have mentally prepared himself for de break long ago le dat's why he seems okie after de break soo why are you still thinking of such people?! i have no answers to all these questions. everyone had been telling me it isn't my fault but i can't control myself to blame myself for wat had happened. wat i clearly noe is dat i realli loved him wif all my heart and why is he treating back like dis?! he wanted freedom and i gave le but is dis wat i derserve?! had i realli done wrong as his girfriend?! am i realli not a good girlfriend?!
iwanastarteverythingalloveragain. can i?
