okie! i'm back! finally got my own laptop le, lenovo! ahaha! still not used to using windows vista! sis says i lose X but i gain a notebook! lol! went for my medical checkup today! nothing much happened too. jus waited veri long for my turn. haha! going out wif ahbet and min hun they all either dis fri or sat! watching dat horro movie, de 1st rule! first time watching horror movie sia! wonder how will my reaction be like? gonna pull min hun sit beside me! i can't wait to start school! excited and looking forward to how poly life will be like! ohya! yst thought things out le. since de break, i hated X. there are thousands and thousands of question in my mind. i wana have de answer particularly for dat question, wat had i done wrong he must treat me like dis?! kerox is right! i'm de most pathetic one. i'm de most pathetic one to be ditched by a guy like dis! all de while, i had been finding a reason to forgive him but i couldn't dat's why my mind is filled wif hatred! but now, i found dat reason le. it's coz i wana be dat sweet loving and forgiving child in god's eyes. i noe god doesn't want his child to be sad either. i wanted soo much a companion, a bf, dat's why i assumed dat X was de one for me. i was veri depressed after de break coz he was nice and liked me and dat's why i always thought he's gonna be my right. however, X's incident made me realised dat god wants me to noe dat X wasn't de one for me. although it might not be easy for me to realli put dis relationship behind me, i noe my friends are always there to give me their support. wif their support, i learnt to grow stronger. no doubt dat X had once killed dat kind and innocent jessica, but also coz of him, de new jessica has a new chance to revive!